Friday, February 20, 2009

Colorgenics Personality Quiz

Date: 2/20/2009
Colorgenics Number: 07125463

At this particular time, you are feeling that you are or were unjustly and undeservedly treated and/or betrayed in your hopes and dreams. You feel that everything is against you. But look on the bright side for you are, whether you believe it or not, a survivor.

You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognise the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.

In spite of the fact that you believe that your hopes and ideas are realistic, it is hard for you to accept that your needs and desires are misunderstood by almost everyone within your sphere of influenceand there is no-one to turn to or rely on. Your pent-up emotions and inherent egocentricity make you quick to take offence, but as matters stand you realise that you will have to make the best of things as they are.

There is considerable amount of stress present in your life at this time and this is perhaps due to some considerable mental and physical frustration. There are various physical needs that are necessary for your well-being but whatever the reasons - mostly of your own making - your needs are not being fulfilled. We wonder why? You are under the impression that nobody seems to care for you. This predicament is most uncomfortable and it is because of this that you are experiencing far more stress than you feel you can cope with. You need to find a soul mate - someone who truly understands you and whose standards are as high as your own. As matters stand you would like to break away from the vicious cycle that you find yourself entrapped but this is easier said than done. You refuse to compromise with your opinions and essentially you are unable to resolve the situation because you are continually postponing the making of the necessary decision. You are stubborn but this should be no deterrent experiencing a happy life.

You feel worn out - you have no energy and your depleted vitality has created intolerance for any further stimulation. You feel inadequate and this subjects you to agitation, irritation and acute distress from which you try to escape by refusing further direct participation. You have become very wary and cautious but you have an inner strength. You have that determination to get your own way and succeed in the end.

Take the quiz yourself!
I was going through my composition journal, since it's going to be checked in class tomorrow and I found this:

"I've got no conscience, I just got nerves."
-from Stalker (film)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Fallen Angels

Michelle Reis is so beautiful, I just like to watch her eat noodles. I used to think it was fun to use chopsticks with my ramen, but I only eat my noodles with a fork now.

Current Status

I am currently needing some ice cream to wash down a waffle with powdered sugar and syrup, some hostess cupcakes (wtf), butterfinger bar, reeses, and chips. !!!
i'm on a diet?
I guess writing a paper overrides any other status quo. like dieting, or socializing, or seeing sunlight.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Definition: Emotion

i was in the library late at night a couple days ago studying for a psychopathology exam, and i was really tired. i was sitting in a cubicle, with bad lighting - everything looked yellow - and although i could hear an occasional page turn from somewhere behind me, i felt i was the only person sitting there on the fourth floor. the library was slowly draining of life behind me. my eyes were blurring, i felt like the people in my book.
as i tried reading faster, i slowed down after the neurological relations part, when the chapter morphs into mood and affect. the definition of emotion provided in this book really ground my process to a halt, as much as i wanted to get out of the library.
basically, the book explained emotion as an "action tendency"
then gave the longer definition as "a pattern of action elicited by an external event and a feeling state, accompanied by a characteristic physiological response."
blah blah ignore the second part unless you're a student of psychology then maybe it'll come in handy, i just thought that might clarify the action part of an emotion for you because i really had to think about it. or maybe i was really jaded and dumb from sitting in a cubicle. voluntarily. but an emotion as an "action tendency" really caught me, and now i can't stop thinking about it in any other way.

Monday, February 16, 2009

I am being such a girl lately.
I don't know if this is good or bad.
I feel I am acting out typical stereotypes - melodramatic, emotional, mood swings, WEIRDNESS, binge eating.
I want to watch the Holiday.

[ignore stupid background video, ignore stupid impulses]