Don't want to go outside

http://growing--up.blogspot.com/

"I don't recognize myself anymore. What made me like the others has been destroyed. I was like everybody else with flaws, perhaps of my own and of my world. You've made me different, taking me out of the natural order of things. While you were near me, I did not realize it. But I understand it now that you're leaving. And the awareness of losing you has become the awareness of my being different. What will become of me from now on? The future will be like living with a self that has nothing to do with me. Will I have to reach the bottom of this difference that you've shown me, that is my real and anguished nature? But even if I don't want to? Won't all this put me against everyone and against everything?"
-Pietro in Teorema

it's kind of sick how i use my creative writing class for supportive therapy. i can't help it, i like to write about emotional conflict and i draw inspiration from my own life. it's actually really soothing hearing 20 people telling you about how your ex is so cruel, treated you wrong, blah blah. and pointing things out such as the idealization of your "boyfriend" although in the story he is providing as much pain as the story's antagonists. and then reading and re-reading all the comments and trying to figure out who wrote them, and who wrote "you" instead of "the narrator." i worry sometimes that they will meet the people i write about. i should worry more that they know too much about me.

Stress

Too listless to write this paper. I feel strange. Not good at all.

It doesn't help that I can hear birds chirping outside already and I still have to shampoo my hair and do sit ups before I step outside and "start the day."
i didn't steal

I need to wash my hair

Hedi Slimane Diary

Work Fun Work

what I've been working on lately



Actually, done with that now! Then there was the French Film Festival, and now the James River Film Festival. Then exams, then summer internship!

life is so busy lately! i can't even be sad, even though my laptop was stolen last monday.